Texting a new hottie is exciting! The first few moments, when you realize that your attraction is mutual and you have a new buddy to share your thoughts with is an amazing feeling. Those first few exchanges are so thrilling and you seem very compatible.
But over time, the conversation seems to lag. He seems less enthused. Maybe neither of you knows what to say. The enthusiasm you first had is gone. You have to wonder, what gives? Why did things start so great and then fizzle out?
Must you always be fun, entertaining, sexy, and hilarious if you want to keep a guy’s attention?
Of course not. But there IS a right way to do it and a wrong way to do it. Unfortunately, a lot of people try to text the wrong way. And yeah, without a plan, without understanding the dynamic of attraction, you do make mistakes. We all do.
So instead of just winging it and hoping for the best, why not have a plan? Here are some tips on how to keep guys interested in texting.
1. Stay positive – always.
The best way to make sure he remembers you is to stay positive – so that he can associate you with good feelings, low anxiety, and a very fun personality. That’s the kind of woman he wants to get serious about. Women who bore him, stress him, or who bring negativity into his life, will never go beyond friends with benefits.
This doesn’t mean you have to lie or create some kind of perfect life facade. No, you can always be honest. But he will be impressed if you can see the good in every situation. The humor. If he can sense you’re happy in life that’s a great sign.
2. Stay busy and dedicated.
Most people who work ARE busy. But the point is, are you enjoying your work? Do you love your job? If not, are you working towards a better goal? When you love what you do it shows. He can feel your energy. And of course, the busier you are, the more he realizes your value. He has to work harder to keep your attention – and he will!
3. Find common interests and focus on chatting about that.
One problem you and many other people may have – trying to talk about “something” or “anything” or maybe your favorite niche subject too. Instead of doing the old fashioned thing, and the thing that still works. That is, talk about the stuff you actually have in common with this guy. That’s the best way to bond. That’s the fastest way to do it. Finding things in common and focusing in on those shared interests works better than anything, any form of seduction, or game playing. Your shared background and life goals will endear you together.
4. Ask fun questions that tickle his sense of humor and his intellect.
Rather than spend too much time sharing opinions, try instead to draw him out into a conversation. Ask fun questions and get him to answer with funny, and brief replies. If a long story comes to mind, then maybe you can move the text chat to a phone call.
But in the meantime, keep chats brief and keep those fun (but short) questions and answers going.
5. Give him space – no obligations.
Once he starts to enjoy himself, that’s a great milestone. Enjoy that. And when you’re both liking the energy, don’t try too hard to seal the deal. Don’t write him more than he’s writing you. Don’t overshare. Don’t have serious conversations about relationships or about anything stressful. He must have time to associate you with fun chat and interesting conversation. Don’t push for regular chats or ask him to write you back. Let him reach out naturally.
6. Send pictures every so often – once a connection is established.
Pictures are a nice touch, not only selfies, but also pretty pictures that reflect something you’ve both talked about previously, or a shared interest you both have. Just don’t send a bunch of selfies before you get a chance to know him, since this sends the wrong message. Or you know, he might think you’re an Instagram spammer.
7. Don’t be afraid of flirting…but only when it feels natural.
You have to walk the line between flirty and feminine, especially in early chats. You don’t want to be afraid of sexual tension. After all, that makes flirting fun and it deepens the attraction you have to each other.
But you can’t come on too strong. If you make it too obvious you’re interested in him, he might back away or just categorize you as a friend with benefits.
When in doubt, be subtle. Let him lead in flirting. Reward him when he takes risks and tells you how he really feels. Men usually will flirt first and what you want is to encourage him to keep going.
8. Make plans to do something.
Finally, don’t forget the importance of progressing to the next phase. Try to get him to call you or go do something fun on the weekend. Encouraging him to share his thoughts in more detail, beyond what texting allows. In other words, don’t be afraid of getting him off texting and into your life. Remember, the more he senses there is something special in this relationship, the more he will be motivated to move things forward. You helping him along and getting him to see a fun adventure beyond just texting friends will get the message across.
As you can see, the key is to keep him interested in you, not just to keep him texting. In fact, the best-case scenario is that your conversation goes so well that he wants to meet in person or talk on the phone. That’s how you know he’s interested!
Keep him interested in you – not just the obligation to text you back. If you adjust your dating and texting strategy, keeping this in mind, you’re going to notice a difference right away.
Text him this to trigger his desire to chase you…
Did you know that you can trigger a man’s hormones through your text messages?
It’s true. How you communicate with a man can actually release different hormones in his body.
One of the most important ones is testosterone because that’s what makes him CHASE you, pursue you, and invest in you so that he gets “hooked” and desires something more with you.
Want to trigger this in your man?
P.S. You can actually trigger a “cocktail of emotions” inside a man that make him feel like he can’t get you out of his mind and even feel addicted to you, if you text him a certain way.