It’s difficult to be objective when you’re in love! In between all those moments of making out, holding hands and looking dreamily into his eyes (whether this is all real or happening in your fantasies!) you might also take the time to ask the question, “Is he right for you?” If he is your boyfriend or you want him to be, is he going to be the Right One or is he going to be a terrible lover, mean boyfriend and evil ex that’s going to haunt your life for years to come?
Yes, it’s not a romantic thought but it’s something many women today should think about. If you decide to get married or live together, you are giving him some of the best years of your life. You want to make sure that he’s worth your time and emotional investment. Because I tell you now, mistakes hurt, even years down the road.
Save yourself the heartache now by making sure he passes the boyfriend test. If he passes, meaning you mark most of these quiz test questions “Yes” then you may have a real diamond on your hands. But if you mostly answer “No…” then you might want to rethink a shotgun wedding.
1. Are you happy most of the time you spend with him?
Does he make you feel excited? Is the effect he has on you, one that makes you a better person?
A simple series of questions, but you might be surprised at how many women would answer no. Many relationships are based on arguing, insulting each other or causing each other heartbreak and then getting back together. The sex may be good and you may like the romance of the breakup followed by getting back together. But are most of your moments spent with him miserable and anxious? Are you a better, happier person when you’re with him? Real love is based on positive feelings. Infatuation is mostly about selfishly craving sex and the rollercoaster ride of negative-positive feeling.
2. Do most of your friends and family like him?
Family and friends can be painfully honest sometimes. And if they sense things about Mr. Boyfriend that you don’t notice, they usually tell you. They can only be “nice” so long, because their instincts are very protective of you. Maybe they notice his facial expressions, or his manner of speaking or some other behavior that seems odd. Maybe you can’t see it right now but they sense something is wrong.
In contrast, the ideal boyfriend is nice to you and your family. He makes an effort to be kind to everyone, from your dog to your mom and dad and even grandma and niece. He doesn’t mind meeting new people if they’re important to you. The family can’t help but love him right along with you.
Your friends will also talk about the two of you as a couple. If they talk about you with envy (as in he’s a great guy and you’re so lucky) or how cute the two of you look together. Friends are more supportive and more vocal when they trust the guy. If not, you won’t hardly hear a word from them.
3. Do you like his friends and family just as much?
If your answer is “What friends?” or “Ummm…” then there may be a problem. There’s a reason why we have the family and friends that we do. They match our lifestyle, our thinking and our behavior. You “inherit” friends when you know it’s the real deal. His friends become your friends. They are looking out for him and they learn to trust you.
In contrast, if you hardly ever see them, haven’t met them yet or really despise them then you may be in for a somewhat toxic relationship. If the guy purposely keeps you away from his friends or family, then be very worried. He obviously knows it’s a complete mismatch and you’re not “family material.”
4. Do you have similar goals in life?
It’s easy to assume opposites attract in life, but statistically speaking most couples do have similar goals and these common values make their relationship stronger. When one partner has completely different schedules, goals, dreams, there is so much room for argument, for growing apart and for resentment.
Now don’t assume just because he wants to be a rock star and you want to be a mother, it’s not going to work out. Or to put in a modern scenario, just because you want to be an actress and he seems more like a househusband, doesn’t mean you’re going to drift apart. It all depends on how much you’re both willing to sacrifice. Do you want him to succeed as much as he wants to grow in his career? Are you going to be supportive of him achieving his dreams or are you going to be more interested in achieving your own goals in life?
It’s not a question of being exactly the same, but a question of just how deeply you love this man and want him to be his best.
And finally a personality question to ponder…
5. If you met another guy who was just as smart, funny, romantic and awesome as your boyfriend, but was slightly richer and more handsome, what would you do?
If you have some lingering curiosity about the new guy this may indicate you’re not as serious about your boyfriend as you first thought. Usually women in relationships don’t cheat or break up with a guy because of sexual temptation…they’re tempted because the new guy fulfills something missing in the guy they’re currently with.
But once you meet “The One” you will find that it doesn’t really matter if there is someone next door who is hotter, younger, richer or whatever. Your heart belongs to your boyfriend. You realize there is always going to be a hotter guy somewhere, but love is about knowing a person, staying loyal to a person and taking care of just one person that has shared an important part of your life.
That’s the true test of a new boyfriend. When you’re in love, you can never walk away. You’re soul mates…confidants. Your boyfriend will soon become the love of your life. He will change your life, forever alter your life for the better. This is when you know you’ve really met The One!
The Secret Behind What Makes a Woman Relationship Material
Have you ever wondered why a man will marry one women yet only want a casual relationship with another?
Have you ever heard a man say that he doesn’t want anything “serious” only to end up in a committed relationship a few weeks later with another woman?
Have you ever felt like you finally found something real with a man… only to have him go cold on you or pull away completely?
The reason this happens maybe be upsetting to you but I promise it’s actually really good news.
Men don’t pull away, disappear, and go cold because they’re bad people…
And they don’t avoid getting into a serious relationship because they’re afraid of commitment.
A man avoids getting into a relationship with a woman because he has doubts that she’s the right woman for him.
He feels like something’s missing…
Like he could probably do better…
If you want a man to feel like you’re the one, there’s one very specific thing that you must do…
After 12 years of working in the dating industry and reaching well over 3 million women, all over the world with my newsletter, interviews, and advice…
I’ve tracked the patterns that women who end up in successful relationships do and here’s what I found…
There’s one key difference between women who end up having a man pursue them for a serious relationship and women who end up single, alone, and frustrated…
Can you guess what it is?